I'm too old for this ......being too scared to do business
I'm too old for this....
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Of all the movie series Lethal Weapon will always be my favorite. I couldn't tell you why, it just has been. When I was a teenager, seeing Mel Gibson blow things up and quip back and forth with Danny Glover was like eye candy. Explosions, shootouts, and Mel Gibson looking great with no shirt, yep that was what I loved spending my Friday nights with the VHS. The classic late 80's style and the constant destruction of cars, buildings, streets, and city municipalities was always a crack up. Murtaugh (Danny Glover) was always trying to fly under the radar and make it to retirement constantly quipping "I'm too old for this s#it", whereas Riggs (Mel Gibson) was semi-suicidal and ran after the bad guys with a lethal level of hatred. As I grew older and more movies came out I always loved watching them one after another. When Rene Russo came into the group, it was like icing on the proverbial kick-butt cake.
Well, I'm no Riggs and have never been a Riggs. But, I find myself feeling like a Murtaugh. Age may be a small part of it, but I definitely feel the difference. As a young girl I have always been a tad on the timid/shy side. I was homeschooling until 7th grade and had to learn my social cues in a small town Colorado Middle School. By the time I got into high school, I began to find more of who I am. However, throughout the entire journey I was constantly afraid of not fitting into the mold. The popular kids, the trendy kids, the nerdy kids, the skinny girls.. I never really fit in. I used to tell myself I didn't care, when really I did. I did activities to practice overcoming these things, such as speech and debate. But, as any young adult moving on in life, I still struggled.
Well, graduating and moving on to college, getting married, having babies and working management positions, I still fell into the what others think trap and avoiding conflict. I constantly worked the hardest I could to be the best as my manager's opinions mattered so much. I wore heels when they were killing my knees and still spent hours prepping myself. I was better about my kids as I wanted them to be better than I was. I didn't want them to fall into my trap. I kept trying to squeeze my square peg self into a round hole, each time I try I shave off little pieces of myself.
What will they think of me? What will they think of my babies? How can I get them to like me? Are my kids clean enough? Do I look great enough? Am I carrying the right bag? Am I doing all the right things? Will I be as good as that 'mom'? Working is that deserting my kids? Will I be considered lazy if I stay at home? If they yell at me, they are saying I'm not good enough? Their opinion matters to me.
Now looking at life as an adult, not a scared teenager, it's a lot of wasted energy. I am the best version of who I am right now and I am too old to worry about what other people think of me. How does this apply to my business?
Well, I have been working at home for four years now and have been doing good enough. I work with my mother-in-law and as a team we decide what needs to be done. We do enough, and have enough, just to make enough. If the dishwasher or car breaks we are up a creek. So, really is it enough? Is just making it enough?
Zig Ziglar once said "If you want something you've never had, then you've got to do something you've never done."
This got me thinking, have I ever not been timid? Has the though of what will others think of me never crossed my mind? Have I ever not be constantly worried I would be thrown out of somewhere if I shared my Avon opportunity? Several times I have forgotten to bring my brochures, or was afraid to burden the person I needed to share with. WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH ME? This is my business, my livelihood. This is how I pay for taekwondo lessons and soccer fees. This is how I am able to work from home so I can taxi my kids to and from places.
I have grown to be ok with ENOUGH, Enough has gotten us by and I have been so blessed that it has continued my ability to be home with my kids. Well, ENOUGH isn't a place to grow from. I had to figure out how to stop the FEAR of what others think to get me out of ENOUGH.
I am stopping the process of Forget Everything and Run, and being to Face Everything and Rise.
No more am I going to allow my FEAR to keep me hostage. The FEAR of going to a new building and introducing myself as their local Avon lady. The FEAR of offering brochures to the cashier at the grocery store or the FEAR of approaching new organizations as a fundraising opportunity.
Instead, I am using the FEAR (Face Everything and Rise) to propel my business. Through new digital revamping (the Internet is a scary place folks), and being consistent with my blog, I will propel my online sales. Being more outspoken and confident about this amazing company I am proud to be apart of. I have been blessed with a great opportunity and need to be able to share it with others. Not afraid of others' opinions or being thrown out of places (Which I have been before and I survived), I will move forward with a furver I've never had before. We will have an amazing team around the country just because I decided to move past the FEAR.
I am not that timid little teen who was unsure of herself. I am no longer that new mom who was worried about keeping up with the other moms who seemed much more perfect than I. I am Me. I am who I need to be right now. No longer do I need to fall victim to the FEAR. I'm too old to be scared. As Mertaugh says "I'm too old for this s#it"
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